I have really bad self harm scars and dating

Would you date someone with self harm scars? | Is It Normal? | planetaokon.info

i have really bad self harm scars and dating

Self-harm is very common and affects more people than you might think. anxiety; low self-esteem; transitions and changes, such as changing schools; alcohol As one young person said, many people self-harm to ”get out the hurt, anger and .. /planetaokon.info [accessed on 11/12/15]. Would self harm scars impact your attraction to someone? But then if you are in bad mental health, a relationship will make it worse. It'll be too much responsibility. So I am NOT saying these people NEVER deserve love. Clear enough. Having self-harm scars and dating can bring about very personal This does not mean that those people are bad people or not worth our time.

If you are having trouble with answering questions about your self-harm scars and dating, however, here are some general guidelines that I find to be helpful.

This does not mean that those people are bad people or not worth our time. There are many reasons someone might not choose to date someone with self-harm scars, most of which are not related to vanity. The good news is, a lot of people — especially casual partners — will not mind the scars too much. In these cases, you may not feel the need to bring the issue up at all. If you do feel the need, or if your partner asks, you could say that the scars are from self-harm without going into detail.

Another option is to make up another explanation for the scarswhich either the partner will believe or take as a cue that this is not something you would like to discuss.

After the drugs, I started making myself throw up.

Would you date a person with self-harm scars? - The Student Room

Eventually, it progressed to enticing my abusive partner to cut me, and later to challenging her to hit me. It just takes diligence and an understanding partner.

i have really bad self harm scars and dating

Not everyone self-harms in the same ways. But, it might not. It becomes a type of addiction. In many cases, the person who self-harms has an inner voice saying that they need to do whatever their self-harming crutch is. We may need you to help talk us out of them sometimes. Threatening to leave us if we relapse is not a good idea. A general rule of thumb is to assume the self-harming behavior has absolutely nothing to do with you.

But remember that once you get over this hurdle there is support and help available. Remember that health professionals, GPs and teachers are familiar with this issue and are there to help. As hard as it is to tell someone, sharing will take the pressure off you and help you get the right support and help available.

What help is available for me? There are lots of support services and treatments available when you feel ready to seek help. If you seek help from your GP, it is likely they will offer you counselling, where a professional will listen and help you to work on solutions and strategies to cope with the problems you are dealing with.

Talking therapies such as cognitive behavioural therapy CBT focus on building coping strategies and problem-solving skills and have been found to be very effective in helping to reduce self-harm [21]. Other forms of counselling, like psychodynamic therapy, for instance, will help you to identify the problems that are causing you distress and leading you to self-harm [22].

It is important that you talk to your GP or a trusted health professional who will help decide the best treatment option for you. There are also a number of charities and self-help groups throughout the UK that can support you through this experience.

Self-harm scars have made me scared to have sex

People who have self-harmed have said that it can be helpful to hear from other young people who have experienced self-harm. More information about these sources of support is available at the end of this booklet. I feel a lot more confident. I felt that, without them knowing, I was being held back.

  • The truth about self-harm
  • Would you date someone with self harm scars?

I no longer feel ashamed as I know people are supporting me. The problems that are causing you to self-harm can, with help and support, become more manageable over time or even go away. Things can and do get better! Take time and be patient with yourself. Start to learn how to care for yourself. Young people who have recovered from self-harm say that changes over time and changes in circumstances in life for example moving home, changing schools, finishing exams, going to university, changing jobs or changed financial circumstances helped them to recover.

Others explained that recovery was about finding new coping strategies and more helpful ways of dealing with emotions or distress. This is also an important factor towards recovery from self-harm.

How can I stop harming myself? Asking for help and having support is very important if you are trying to stop self-harming. It is important that you do this when you feel ready to talk about it. Talking to someone is what is important. For young people used to carrying burdens on their own, it can be hard to receive support.

Showing him my scars - Self-harm and us - The Mix

Part of recovery is trusting people enough to let them help you. Talking to someone you trust can help you discover why you self-harm and help to find new ways to cope with difficulties [25].

Finding out what makes you happy, sad, angry, isolated, vulnerable or strong can help you develop other ways of dealing with these feelings. Counselling is a good way of exploring these thoughts and feelings and is available through your GP. These techniques find a release for the emotional pressure you feel without the need to harm. If you feel the need to harm yourself, try to give yourself a goal of getting through the next ten minutes without doing so.

Write down thoughts and feelings that are distressing you; crumple the page up, rip it apart and throw them out as a way to let go of that thought. Hit a pillow or cushion to vent your anger and frustration. Have a good scream into a pillow or cushion. Take a minute and breathe or meditate. Go for a walk to take yourself away from triggers. Being in a public place gives you the time and space to reduce the urge to hurt yourself.

Make lots of noise, either with a musical instrument or just banging on pots and pans. Scribble on a large piece of paper with a red crayon or pen. Call a friend or family member and talk to them.

Listen to music you like or watch a film you enjoy. Go online and look at self-help websites. Talk to someone about what is triggering you or seek help from a professional. But the most helpful to my recovery was the five minutes rule, where if you feel like you want to self-harm, you wait for five minutes before you do it, then see if you can go another five minutes, and so on till eventually the feeling that you need to is over.

However if you are self-harming it can be difficult to stop, especially when you feel distressed or upset.

How To Date A Woman With A Self-Harming Past

Wounds and injuries of any type can be dangerous and carry the risk of infection, which can be serious, so they need to be looked after. If you have serious injury, feel unwell or feel that you are going into shock fast breathing, racing heart, feeling faint or panicked you should seek help immediately.

i have really bad self harm scars and dating

If you find yourself in this situation, find a trusted adult or friend who can get you the medical attention you need. It is a huge step towards stopping when they begin to talk about it, because it means that they are starting to think about what might take its place eventually.