Self-Injury & Relationships | Scarleteen
Her outlet was cutting and she has two arm-fulls of scars to show for it. someone I was already dating if I found out they were self-harming. Why I Made My Self-Injury Scars Visible In My Online Dating Profile . I used the good girl triangle of vices (starve, purge, cut) to survive high. I have a few self harm scars. Most of I am worried that this will be a hindrance to my ability to date a girl. I am 23 I am a recovering cutter.
How To Date A Woman With A Self-Harming Past – KitschMix
Ever since I can remember I've had horrible horrible body issues. But before I look at that, I want to discuss what self-harm or self-injury actually is.
Self harm isn't usually a sign that someone is suicidal, in most cases, it is in fact a cry for help, a method of coping, a way NOT to commit suicide. If you find out someone you know is self harming, I urge you not to jump to the conclusion they are trying to kill themselves, and most of all, to not panic. Self harm can be done by many methods, and without going into detail, it's anything which causes injury or pain to yourself, which you've done as a deliberate act.
So that means accidentally cutting your wrist by brushing it against something sharp in an accident isn't self harm, but deliberately holding your straightener at the hot end is. Another rumor about self harm I want to dispell is that only teenage girls do it.
That's just not true. Many many men and women of all ages self harm, and statistics show that if you're in a developed country 1 in 3 people will self harm at some point in your life.
So if you go to school in a class of thirty students, maybe 10 of them are hurting themselves. So why self harm?
People self harm for all manner of reasons, but one of the most common is to turn emotional pain which they don't know how to deal with into physical pain, which they do know how to deal with.
Another reason might be to "punish" themselves, often for crimes known only to themselves. Why does this affect me? Well, for all you know one of those 10 classmates could be your best friend.
Would you date someone with self harm scars? If not, why? : AskReddit
And one of the things that hurt me the most was when I finally gathered the courage to tell one of my friends and they reacted in completely the wrong way, and caused a lot of trouble and friction between us. She assumed that I was mentally unstable, that I was trying to kill myself, and that the only way to handle the situation was to never let me near anything sharp ever again. Ultimately, the decision is up to you.
You are in control of your own narrative and there is no obligation on your part to do things one way or the other. If you are having trouble with answering questions about your self-harm scars and dating, however, here are some general guidelines that I find to be helpful.
This does not mean that those people are bad people or not worth our time. There are many reasons someone might not choose to date someone with self-harm scars, most of which are not related to vanity.
The good news is, a lot of people — especially casual partners — will not mind the scars too much. In these cases, you may not feel the need to bring the issue up at all.
“When Should I Tell Men About My Scars From Cutting?”
When I first started self-harming, for example, I would mainly hit myself or pull my hair. As I grew older, I began cutting and experimenting with drugs.
After the drugs, I started making myself throw up. Eventually, it progressed to enticing my abusive partner to cut me, and later to challenging her to hit me.
- How To Date A Woman With A Self-Harming Past
- Self-Injury & Relationships
It just takes diligence and an understanding partner. Not everyone self-harms in the same ways. But, it might not. It becomes a type of addiction. In many cases, the person who self-harms has an inner voice saying that they need to do whatever their self-harming crutch is. We may need you to help talk us out of them sometimes.